I DON'T KNOW NO ONE 'CAUSE MY BRAIN WORE OUT!

I Don’t Know No One, ‘Cause my Brain Wore Out!  

(Tune: Nobody Knows You When You’re Down and Out!)

Once I lived the life of a college grad, 

Had lots of friends and I was always glad!

Went to plays and movies, read lots of books, 

Went to nice restaurants with very good cooks!

Then my memory forgot how to store,

At first it was just numbers, but then it was more!

Birthdays, anniversaries, name and places, 

Like a deck of cards, without any aces!   

(Chorus) 

I don’t know no one, cause my brain wore out! 

Under my hat, there’s just grey hair!

Aside from that, there’s not much there!

If we ever meet on the street again,

I hope that I would greet you like a long lost friend, 

But now I fear I’ll just stare in doubt, 

You see - I don’t know no one, 'cause my brain wore out!

                             Lyrics © 2023 Joan Levin

D.C.Metro L-4 Bus Song

Once the Metro was working they were talking about limiting or even terminating the L4 bus line. (Oh my goodness that was nearly half a century ago!) Is the L4 still running? Joan Levin, June, 2023 

 Hands Off L-4!! 

Tune, Wabash Cannonball 

Words by Joan D. Levin 

                              ___________________

 From stately Federal Triangle to the hills of Chevy Chase, 

With slow but steady motion she moves from place to place. 

She’s the Grand-dame of the Great Northwest, 

You’ve heard her name before, 

She’s the pride of the Metro system; she’s the elegant L-4! 

    Chorus: Hear the fare box jingle, oh what a pleasant sound,

    Look right out the window, and see the city round! 

    Let us travel on the road we’ve traveled oft before – 

    You can keep your Metro train; just leave us our L-4! 

 She rolls along Thirteenth Street, and down the mighty K, 

She passes on to Twentieth and Florida by the way. 

She cruises up Connecticut and lumbers down once more, 

She’s a shelter in a time of storm, our very own L-4! 

    Chorus: Hear the fare box jingle, oh what a pleasant sound,

    Look right out the window, and see the city round! 

    Let us travel on the road we’ve traveled oft before – 

    You can keep your Metro train; just leave us our L-4! 

 If you would like to make a trip for lunch in Cleveland Park,

 Or if you’d like to see the sights of Dupont after dark, 

The L-1 will not stop for you; the L-7 doesn’t run, 

So climb aboard the old L-4 to get in on the fun! 

      Chorus: Hear the fare box jingle, oh what a pleasant sound,

    Look right out the window, and see the city round! 

    Let us travel on the road we’ve traveled oft before – 

    You can keep your Metro train; just leave us our L-4! 

 If you go downtown shopping, to catch up on the sales, 

To doctor or the dentist, to keep you feeling hale, 

To work, to play, most any day, or anywhere you roam, 

 The L-4 bus will take you there and bring you safely home! 

 © 1981, Joan D. Levin

While Fighting Off Senility. 2023 and Apologies to the Bard

While fighting off senility To best of my ability, It may sound like banality, To say that rationality, Is something that I seem to lack, My skull is like an empty sack! Thoughts follow scattered, unknown trails, Like a train run off the rails! They wander off to who knows where? Then pop up sometimes, here or there! An idiot’s tale of sound and fury? Macbeth spoke well. So what’s my hurry? April 26, 2023

AGL's Birthday, December 25, 2022

 

THE CHANGE SONG

The Change Song

Tune: These Boots are Made for Walking

(by Nancy Sinatra)

Heracleitus said these words quite early:

You can’t step in that same river twice!

Change is all that’s constant, know it surely -- 

That’s what gives our life its extra spice!

Mutatis mutandis!

Is where it’s at, that’s true!

And every single day those changes wash up over you!

Whitehead said each moment we’re evolving –  

We’re not the gal or fella’ that we were;

Life is just a problem for the solving, 

And that is all that we can know for sure!  

Mutatis mutandis!

Just try not to stew! 

You can master change, it doesn’t have to master you!

The path you’re treading may seem harsh and cruel,

Hard luck striking like an ugly toad,

But strife and evil may conceal a jewel,

Hidden in the dust along life’s road –

Mutatis mutandis,

Cheer up, don’t be blue!

Adversity has sweet uses;  if you look you’ll see that’s true!  

So when those changes roll into your station,  

Hop aboard and ride for all you’re worth,

You may not know the final destination,

But what a way to travel on this earth!

Mutatis mutandis!

No matter what you do!

You can’t fight it, learn to love it, let it work for you!  

© Joan Levin 2000 

ODE TO MY BLOOD PRESSURE

A little high, a little low, 

A little fast, a little slow; 

There seems to be no way I know,

To bring about perfection!  

Since watching diet is not enough, 

I do my part with pills and cuff, 

But still I don't have the right stuff! 

Please tell me: Where's perfection?

                                                                                         ###

THE PUMPKIN TREE

The Pumpkin Tree 

A Tribute to my D. C. neighbors,  the Hessels, with apologies to A.E.Houseman!

Loveliest of trees the pumpkin now, 

Is hung with orange along the bough,

And stands quite close to Rock Creek Park,

Where Hessels watch from dawn to dark!

Now of my fourscore years and ten,

Eighty will not come again, 

And take from ten still left — at most,   

Just add it up: my life is toast!

But even as I groan and wheeze, 

And limp about on aging knees, 

I still can laugh long as I please, 

And watch the Hessel’s Pumpkin Trees!

With apologies to A.E. Houseman: 

https://poets.org/poem/loveliest-trees

and see:  

https://poemanalysis.com/a-e-housman/loveliest-of-trees/ 

                                              ###

WHO IS AMERICA'S DOCTOR IN 2021?

Decades ago when babies went amok,

Their parents turned for help to Dr. Spock!

Now that these babes are grown, and scared and grouchy,  

For COVID help they turn to Dr. Fauci!

###

EAT YOUR HEART OUT EMILY DICKINSON

 As I deal with my Prolia-fractured bones (see www.JoansBackboneDisaster.com) and macular degeneration of the eyes, my thoughts turn to the poet Emily Dickinson, who, while dealing with disabilities of her own, nevertheless turned out hundreds of brief poems, each an insightful gem!

To learn more about the life and work of Emily Dickinson, see: 

https://poets.org/poet/emily-dickinson

Here is my brief homage -- admittedly inadequate -- to this exquisite poet!

                          ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

      An Unexpected Source of Inspiration?

Roosevelt struggled with crutches, 

John Milton’s eyes couldn’t see,

Fate caught them both in its clutches, 

And now it has seized upon me!

I’ve studied the lives of these masters,  

Especially the blind and the lame, 

Who triumphed o’er body’s disasters, 

But I’ll pass on them all just the same! 

                        ###

ANOTHER POEM FOR DIRECT TV

Yet more problems with Direct TV!

Ode to a Frozen Screen

The President is on the screen, I want to hear his speech!

Pro or Con, I’m glad TV puts this within my reach!

But as he takes the podium at the venue he has chosen,

His steps come to a sudden stop, because my screen is FROZEN!

The bottom of the ninth is here, the crowd is on its feet,

And as this game is televised, my view is hard to beat!

The pitcher spits into his glove and climbs that tiny hill — 

But as he does so, once again, the picture stands STOCK STILL!

A great romance, and lovers are enmeshed in fond embrace,

“Please marry me!” he says, and now you’re right up in his face!  

But as the camera turns to her and she begins to speak — 

The picture FREEZES, and you’ll have to learn the rest next week!

A famous trial is taking place, we’re waiting for the jury, 

The verdict will be coming soon, there isn’t any hurry.

The pundits are discussing pros and cons about this case;

But FROZEN SCREEN jumps in to keep them locked in just one place.

Somewhere someone turns on TV, and watches for an hour, 

Without the picture standing still as if it’s lost its power!

Somewhere for a day (or hour!) it’s as it’s supposed to be;

But that’s not at 1300, Apartment Twenty D!   

(Written for Direct TV, April 20, 2021)

A POEM FOR OUR DIRECT TV, OUR SATELLITE TV SERVICE

 I had trouble with our satellite TV (Direct TV managed in our building by USA Wireless).  I kept getting the error message 771 on my screen!  Keith at USA Wireless (847-831-4561) was helpful so this is for him! April 2, 2021                               

Ode to 771 

Our Condo Board had voted; we got Direct TV!

We all got brand new clickers, and lots more shows to see.

But no one ever told us that to get in on the fun,

We’d have to live with Error Number Seven-Seven-One!

Here comes a big announcement: Prepare for Breaking News!

The weather will be storming!  Get out your rubber shoes!

Stay tuned here for more details!  But before this can be done,

The broadcast stops and all I see is Seven-Seven-One!

Or maybe there’s a movie, Joan Fontaine and Cary Grant, 

Or maybe an adventure or a politician’s rant!

Or maybe a big baseball game, or thrilling mystery!

It matters not, with Seven-Seven-One there is no more to see!

Day in, day out, most every hour, this message hits my screen!

For seconds, minutes or an hour, there’s nothing to be seen!

Time just stands still, it simply freezes! Here’s a thought for you: 

Could Seven-Seven-One just make the clock stop for us too?

APRIL 2, 2021

ODE TO MY UPPER RIGHT SECOND BICUSPID

I lost a filling from this tooth March 12, 2021, unfortunately on a Friday afternoon.  It doesn't hurt, but I hope to be able to see my dentist, Dr. Bisterfeldt, in the next few days.  I wrote this poem for him.  

ODE TO MY UPPER RIGHT SECOND BICUSPID

Joan Levin

 March 13, 2021

You’ve been a good friend for eight decades and more, 

But now you’re in trouble dear tooth Number Four!

Where once was smooth surface, now lies a big hole;

I hope Doctor Bisterfeldt can make you whole!

You’ve sampled my cooking and lots of my baking,

I hope that this injury won’t leave you aching! 

Soon I will sit in that well-equipped chair, 

And quickly will learn what remains of you there! 

You’ve been right there with me, so able and willing,

I’m hoping that that all you will need is a filling!

                                            ###

And see my other tooth poems on this blog!  Just search on "molar!"

ARE YOU PARDONED TONIGHT? FOR THE 2021 INAUGURAL

On January 20, 2021, Joseph R. Biden and Kamala Harris were inaugurated as President and Vice-President of the United States. 

But right up to the last minute our twice-impeached ex-President, Donald J. Trump, was busy handing out pardons to his felonious friends, many serving time, for all sorts of white-collar crimes.  

It called for a little song! So I wrote one that may be sung to the tune of Elvis Presley's unforgettable song: 

Are you Lonesome Tonight?

so here, with apologies to Elvis, is:

Are you Pardoned Tonight?

Are you pardoned tonight?

Are you pardoned tonight?

Tell me pol, are you pardoned tonight?

Are your cheats large and small, 

Gone for good and for all?

Is your slate now pristine, clean and bright?

Did the President give you that Trumpian grin,

Right before his successor was finally sworn in?

Will  you be his best pal?

Are you in his corral?

Tell me pol, are you pardoned tonight?

(With apologies to Elvis! ) 

You can sing along right here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_cS5aCozhcA

Parody Lyrics (c) Joan Levin, 2021